We all face challenges that seem to crush us, take our joy and spirit away.
My husband killed himself after 8 attempts, partners lying and cheating, losing our home, addiction, miscarriages, reputation attacked, being falsely loved, losing our job, nil return on investments, coping with the disease of self or loved ones and even emotion and physical abuse.
From there; it's either left or right, up or down, pessimism or optimism, blame or responsibility, truth or lying to oneself and others, being real or pretending and hiding it from the world.
We have best buds for a reason; yes friendship is a trade however we usually have one unconditional love buddy.
That's the buddy we need to connect with when our joy seems gone. You will recognise these characters as they don't trade the friendship, the ones there for you at 3am when you are vomiting all over the walls, the ones that will cry with you over the death of a loved one, the ones that use actions rather than words, the ones that help with that uni paper at 5am, the ones that put your debts on their credit card, the ones whose eyes fill with your pain when your light has dimmed. You will recognise them as they are respected and loved.
Find your ULB - unconditional love buddy, share you are feeling crushed, you need listening to and perhaps they can make a decision for you if need be. Let them lift you up, let them give you true joy, let them encourage you to laugh and cry.
Let them carry your burden for a little while whilst you rest. Make a choice to be REAL and AUTHENTIC and stand with your ULB and say "help me" and together both of you say to each other You're brilliant!